Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Sexfiles Vol. 4

This was originally published in 1998 in issue 13 of Married Punks.


Sexfiles Vol. 4

Sylvia Saint, Raven, Angel, Hakan, Oliva, Stefanie Swift, Sash, Valentino, Rhonda and Jeremy Steele star in what is definitely Xplor's weakest series.

Basically, the Sexfiles series is just sex scenes with nothing joining them together.  I think some, if not all, are culled from other Xplor videos that are worth watching.  The best thing to say is that these videos still kick the ass of most compilation videos from other companies.  For all my complaints, there is one standout scene, though.

A blonde-haired girl, who reminds me of Sandra Bernhard for some reason, wearing a backwards baseball cap (reminding me of that bubble-brain Shane), takes on two guys in a bedroom.  She's shaved down south, and one guy has a huge, uncircumcised penis.  She eventually takes some love juice on her pierced tongue and then lets the guy suck it out of her mouth.  This scene is strangely hot, and that worries me.

Here's my idea for the series: two investigators (a guy and a girl) investigate strange sexual cases.  Maybe they can check out nymphos, women with large clits, or a guy that can suck his own penis.  The investigators have sex and stuff, as is par for the course.  Seeing as the name of the series is a take on The X-Files, why not do something really cool with it.  Hell, I could write a script for you if you want.  Xplor, are you listening?

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